Shadows Give Strength | The Scribbled Writings

Relationship between two souls – be it friends, family and love is always mutual. Some relationships in our life have given moments of happiness while some, lessons of wisdom through sorrow. And we have always considered bright things such as happiness, smile, sunrise to be the example for motivation. On the contrary, we have always considered darkness, shadow and tears as a sign of negativity. However, shadows give your relationship strength. Want to know why? Read ahead.

Few weeks ago, I eavesdropped a conversation between my dad and his closest friend.

“We had handpicked friends with whom we went to school, swam in the river, cycled naked feet throughout the village and stopped by to stone pelt and taste the raw tangy mangoes to soothe our oozed tongues”, said my dad’s friend as he glanced me scrolling the Facebook feed on my mobile.

“Man indeed a social animal. Else he would not have built a platform to socialize with our own friends and relatives to make money out of it”. The conversation went on. Today with the plethora of social media platforms like Facebook, WhatsApp, and Instagram on the rise, we are better informed about where our neighbor / friend has checked in than any one else. Social media has outgrown to such an extent that we have lost the count of the number of real friends in our life.

Life indeed tests us in many ways. It tests the strength in our relationships by putting us in challenging situations, waiting eagerly to make the difficult choice. It has always been the hard way. You might have experienced this in your life too – where you needed the support system of your life, the one from whom you always seek guidance in the eleventh hour, just to find that you’ve been left deserted. It’s very true to say as an adage,

“Just as the sun sets fading away your shadow allowing darkness to enter,
you have to be in the most helpless and vulnerable situation,
to find who you are when you all alone.”

You might have thousands of friends who know you, follow you and might also help you advising at tough times. But to be very honest, you can count your real friends on one hand. Just like the true friends my father had. Sometimes you will learn, people are just not who you thought they were. Or they were, but they changed. Or — and this is the most difficult explanation to accept — they’ve always been this way but you didn’t allow yourself to see it. You will experience it the hard way – by losing them. But don’t regret for you know how much they valued you.

Some relationships break just to make you a better person.

You might have been stabbed a couple of knives on your back when it comes to friends , best friends and relationships too. But do you know what keeps you going in life with a smile on your face making you resilient? Expecting nothing in return.

An advice my mother ingrained in my soul when I was very young.

She said – Help people who are in need; regardless of any expectations. Expect nothing but the joy / smile on their face. Be the strong reason with your presence at their tough times and let them know that you stood by them. Don’t let anyone be stabbed by you on the name of friendship / love / relationships.

So count the friends who have helped you through the tough times and write a beautiful thank you note. It will bring a brief moment of contentment, a sense of satisfaction that will shed a tear of joy of your name.